Cicero Letters to Atticus, Vol. 2 of 3 57

Cicero Letters to Atticus, Vol. 2 of 3 57

As for his financial affairs, I often hear from him, and they are

not in such a state as to prevent him from being anxious to pay you

and from making efforts to that end: but if Q. Axius does not pay me

in this my flight the £100 I lent his son, and pleads in excuse the

state of the times, and if Lepta and others do the same, I confess I

am always surprised to hear from Quintus that he is pressed for some

£175. For of course you see his straits. However he has ordered the

sum to be paid to your account. Perhaps you suppose that he is slow or

close-fisted in money matters. No one is less so: but enough about my

brother.

 

As for his son, the father has certainly always indulged him; but

indulgence does not make him a liar or a miser or disloyal to his

friends, though it does perhaps make him surly, haughty and aggressive.

Accordingly he has these defects which are due to spoiling; but they

are not intolerable, shall I say, as young men go nowadays. But the

defects which, to

 

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quae mihi quidem, qui illum amo, sunt his ipsis malis, in quis sumus,

miseriora, non sunt ab obsequio nostro. Nam suas radices habent;

quas tamen evellerem profecto, si liceret. Sed ea tempora sunt, ut

omnia mihi sint patienda. Ego meum facile teneo; nihil est enim eo

tractabilius. Cuius quidem misericordia languidiora adhuc consilia

cepi, et, quo ille me certiorem vult esse, eo magis timeo, ne in eum

exsistam crudelior.

 

Sed Antonius venit heri vesperi. Iam fortasse ad me veniet, aut ne id

quidem, quoniam scripsit, quid fieri vellet. Sed scies continuo, quid

actum sit. Nos iam nihil nisi occulte.

 

De pueris quid agam? parvone navigio committam? Quid mihi animi in

navigando censes fore? Recordor enim, aestate cum illis illo Rhodiorum

ἀφράκτῳ navigans quam fuerim sollicitus; quid duro tempore anni

actuariola fore censes? O rem undique miseram!

 

Trebatius erat mecum, vir plane et civis bonus. Quae ille monstra, di

immortales! Etiamne Balbus in senatum venire cogitet? Sed ei ipsi cras

ad te litteras dabo. Vettienum mihi amicum, ut scribis, ita puto esse.

Cum eo, quod ἀποτόμως ad me scripserat de nummis curandis, θυμικώτερον

eram iocatus. Id tu, si ille aliter acceperit ac debuit, lenies.

"MONETALI" autem adscripsi, quod ille ad me "PRO COS." Sed, quoniam est

homo et nos diligit, ipse quoque a nobis diligatur. Vale.

 

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me at any rate who love him, are more distressing than even the evils

on which we have fallen, do not proceed from any indulgence of mine;

for they are deep rooted: but I would have rooted them up, had I

been allowed. But the times are such that I must bear everything. My

own son I control easily. He is quite tractable. My own policy has

lacked vigour owing to my pity for him; and the more he wants me to be

unflinching, the more I fear I may prove cruel to him.

 

Well Antony came yesterday evening; soon perhaps he will visit me,

perhaps not even that, as he has written what he wanted done; but you

shall know forthwith what has happened. All I do now is done secretly.

 

What shall I do about the boys? Shall I entrust them to a small boat?

What courage do you suppose I shall have on the voyage? For I remember

sailing in the summer in an open Rhodian boat with them and how anxious

I was; and how do you suppose it will be in the bad season in a tiny

pinnace? Misery everywhere!

 

Trebatius is with me, a real man and a loyal citizen. Ye gods, what

awful news he brings! So even Balbus is thinking of attending the

Senate! But I will give Trebatius himself a letter for you to-morrow. I

agree with your letter that Vettienus is friendly to me. But I made a

rather bitter jest at his expense, because he wrote curtly to me about

paying my debt. Appease him, if he took it in bad part. I addressed

him by his title "commissioner of the mint" because he addressed me as

"proconsul." But since he is a good man and has affection for me, let

me keep my affection for him. Farewell.

 

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XII

 

CICERO ATTICO SAL.

 

 

[Sidenote: _Scr. in Cumano III Non. Mai. a. 705_]

 

Quidnam mihi futurum est, aut quis me non solum infelicior, sed iam

etiam turpior? Nominatim de me sibi imperatum dicit Antonius, nec me

tamen ipse adhuc viderat, sed hoc Trebatio narravit. Quid agam nunc,

cui nihil procedit, caduntque ea, quae diligentissime sunt cogitata,

taeterrime? Ego enim Curionem nactus omnia me consecutum putavi. Is

de me ad Hortensium scripserat. Reginus erat totus noster. Huic nihil

suspicabamur cum hoc mari negotii fore. Quo me nunc vertam? Undique

custodior. Sed satis lacrimis. Παρακλεπτέον igitur et occulte in

aliquam onerariam corrependum, non committendum, ut etiam compacto

prohibiti videamur. Sicilia petenda. Quam si erimus nacti, maiora

quaedam consequemur. Sit modo recte in Hispaniis! Quamquam de ipsa

Sicilia utinam sit verum! Sed adhuc nihil secundi. Concursus Siculorum

ad Catonem dicitur factus, orasse, ut resisteret, omnia pollicitos;

commotum illum dilectum habere coepisse. Non credo, ut est luculentus

auctor. Potuisse certe teneri illam provinciam scio. Ab Hispaniis autem

iam audietur.

 

Hic nos C. Marcellum habemus, eadem vere cogitantem aut bene

simulantem; quamquam ipsum non videram, sed ex familiarissimo eius

audiebam. Tu, quaeso, si quid habebis novi; ego, si quid moliti erimus,

ad te statim scribam. Quintum filium severius

 

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XII

 

CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.

 

 

[Sidenote: _Cumae, May 5_, B.C. _49_]

 

What is to happen to me? Who is there more ill-starred, or even more

humiliated? Antony says he has received orders about me definitely. Yet

I have not seen him myself so far; but he told Trebatius. What can I

do now? Nothing succeeds and all my best laid plans fail abominably.

For, when I had won over Curio, I imagined I had attained my end. He

had written about me to Hortensius. Reginus was wholly my friend. I

never suspected that Antony had anything to do with this part of the

sea. Whither can I turn now? Everywhere I am watched. But enough of

lamentation. I must steal away and creep privily into some cargo boat;

I must not allow it to appear that I connive at being hindered. I must

go to Sicily. If I once get there, I shall have greater ends in view.

If only all goes well in Spain! However, I do hope the news about

Sicily may prove true! Hitherto I have had no luck. It is said the

Sicilians have gathered round Cato, prayed him to resist and promised

every support: and that he has been induced to begin making a levy. I

don't believe it, good as the authority is. I know for a fact that that

province could have been held. But we shall soon hear from Spain.

 

Here I have C. Marcellus, who holds the same views as myself or makes a

good pretence of doing so. I have not indeed met him myself; but I hear

it from one of his most intimate friends. Write to me, if you have any

news. If I attempt anything, I shall inform you at once. Young Quintus

I shall handle

 

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adhibebo. Utinam proficere possim! Tu tamen eas epistulas, quibus

asperius de eo scripsi, aliquando concerpito, ne quando quid emanet;

ego item tuas. Servium exspecto, nec ab eo quicquam ὑγιές. Scies,

quicquid erit.

 

 

 

 

XIIa

 

CICERO ATTICO SAL.

 

 

[Sidenote: _Scr. in Cumano prid. Non. Mai. a. 705_]

 

Sine dubio errasse nos confitendum est. "At semel, at una in re." Immo

omnia quo diligentius cogitata eo facta sunt imprudentius.

 

Ἀλλὰ τὰ μὲν προτετύχθαι ἐάσομεν ἀχνύμενοί περ, in reliquis modo ne

ruamus. Iubes de profectione me providere. Quid provideam? Ita patent

omnia, quae accidere possunt, ut, ea si vitem, sedendum sit cum

dedecore et dolore, si neglegam, periculum sit, ne in manus incidam

perditorum. Sed vide, quantis in miseriis simus. Optandum interdum

videtur, ut aliquam accipiamus ab istis quamvis acerbam iniuriam, ut

tyranno in odio fuisse videamur. Quodsi nobis is cursus, quem speraram,

pateret, effecissem aliquid profecto, ut tu optas et hortaris, dignum

nostra mora. Sed mirificae sunt custodiae, et quidem ille ipse Curio

suspectus. Quare vi aut clam agendum est et, si vi, fortiter cum

tempestate.[151] Clam autem istis? In quo si quod σφάλμα, vides, quam

turpe sit. Trahimur, nec fugiendum, si quid violentius.

 

[151] et si vi forte ne cum pestate _M_: et si vi forte et cum

tempestate _Ant._, _F._ _I have adopted Orelli's reading; but it is very uncertain._