A Lady of England 14

A Lady of England 14

CHARLES. O horrible, horrible, most horrible! It cannot, O

it cannot be! What a dreadful, what a fearful fate! O that

the first step I took from my Father’s home had been into a

horse-pond! that I had died e’er I left it!

 

O’SHAN. Ay, there’s the pity! Had ye stayed peaceably at home,

this would never have happened to ye.

 

CHARLES. The gallows! can it be?

 

O’SHAN. Ah, how all the Ladies will pity ye! such a likely lad,

and so young, and ...

 

CHARLES. Silence! you distract me.

 

O’SHAN. Poor gintleman! when it comes to the pinch, when the

rope ...

 

CORP. No more, O’Shannon! You have secured his arms. Bring him

speedily along with you. No delay!

 

CHARLES. My limbs can scarcely support me! O day of agony, of

misery, and despair! [_Exeunt._]

 

 

SCENE VI.

 

THE PARLOUR.

 

COLONEL STUMPLY.

 

COL. [_Rubbing his hands._] Caught! caught! This is indeed a

good day’s work.

 

_Enter SOPHIA, BARBARA, and HORATIA._

 

COL. Ah! ha! my pretty Jacobites, this comes of your plotting.

The Pretender is in safe hands now. Who would have thought you

up to such a conspiracy?

 

HORATIA. Alas, our unhappy Prince!

 

SOPHIA. [_Aside to HORATIA._] Poor Daresby! It makes my heart

faint to think of him. I cannot stay to look on.

 

HORATIA. You must stay to keep him silent. ’Tis but for an hour.

I am ashamed of you. Remember that you have a part to perform.

 

SOPHY. I cannot say what is not true.

 

HORATIA. Say nothing, then.

 

_Enter DARESBY guarded._

 

DARESBY. [_To the COL._] Sir, I demand an explanation of this

most extraordinary and unjustifiable treatment. Sir, I am a

gentleman and ... [_HORATIA makes earnest signs to him to be

silent._]

 

COL. You shall be treated, Sir, with all the respect due to your

station, consistent with your safe custody.

 

DARESBY. Of what am I charged? Who is my accuser? what wretch

dares? [_HORATIA repeats the signs._] What is the meaning of all

this nonsense? Do you wish to make a fool of me? I’ll not endure

this ...

 

COL. Be calm, Sir, and submit to destiny.

 

DARESBY. I’ll not submit to such treatment. My name is ...

 

[_HORATIA in an agony throws herself at his feet, exclaiming_] O

noble man! for the sake of all you love....

 

DARESBY. Horatia, I am in a dream. Sophy, of you I ask, I

entreat, an explanation. Why am I thus confined? Why do you

stand calmly looking on my disgrace?

 

SOPHY. Calmly! O Da ... [_Aside._] I cannot restrain my tears.

 

DARESBY. Are you too my enemy?

 

SOPHY. Your enemy! O!

 

DARESBY. [_To the COLONEL._] Are my political opinions

suspected? Am I supposed to be a Ja....

 

HORATIA. You are known--you are known--to be--to be--to be ...

[_Enter WEASEL._]

 

HORATIA. [_Springing to SOPHIA’S side._] O Sophy, for pity’s

sake take that creature off, or....

 

SOPHY. Weasel, Weasel! [_Aside._] What can I say?

 

WEASEL. What! Dr. Da....

 

SOPHIA. Weasel, Weasel, will you go directly to the garden and

fetch....

 

WEASEL. What, Miss?

 

SOPHIA. Fetch, fetch--some spinach.

 

WEASEL. Spinach don’t grow in November, Miss, as Dr....

 

HORATIA. Go to the village directly for....

 

WEASEL. Can’t go to the village no more, Miss, till I’ve laid

the cloth for breakfast. The Doc....

 

HORATIA. We must have wine. Go to the cellar.

 

WEASEL. Haven’t got the keys, Miss. If I might make bold to ask

why....

 

HORATIA. Begone this instant ... we shall want poultry. Wring

every chicken’s neck in the yard, or I’ll wring yours as sure as

I stand here! [_Exit WEASEL._]

 

COL. What an extraordinary temper!

 

DARESBY. Sophy, Sophy, if you are still the ingenuous being

I ever believed you to be, tell me in what farce I am thus

forced to act a part against my will. Tell me the secret of the

conspiracy which seems formed against me. Are you an accessory?

 

COL. Why, the Ladies have been turning every stone in your

defence! They never let out the secret! As far as they were

concerned you might have remained in your vault until you were

old enough to stay there altogether!

 

DARESBY. Every sentence that I hear bewilders me yet more. Ratty

Rattleton, Ratty Rattleton, you are at the bottom of the plot.

 

_Enter MRS. JUDITH._

 

HORATIA. [_Aside._] Aunt Judy! this is distraction!

 

MRS. JUD. Young Daresby, my....

 

HORATIA. Aunt, Aunt....

 

MRS. JUD. What’s the matter?

 

HORATIA. The ... [_aside_] at last I seem come to my wits end!

[_Aloud._] The....

 

DARESBY. Mrs. Judith Rattleton, you are my friend, you will bear

witness....

 

HORATIA. The most important....

 

SOPHIA. O dear Aunt....

 

BARBARA. If you would only hold your tongue!

 

MRS. JUD. What a racket! what ... why....

 

DARESBY. Mrs. Judith, I am here charged with....

 

MRS. JUD. You, Daresby! Why, Colonel, this is....

 

COL. Not the Prince! Then he is concealed in the house! I see

all; follow me, Guards ... [_SOPHY throws herself at his feet;

HORATIA and BARBARA rush to the door._]

 

HORATIA. You shall pass over my corpse! I am desperate! [_The

door suddenly opens. Enter CHARLES guarded by O’SHANNON and the

CORPORAL._]

 

ALL THE YOUNG LADIES. The Prince! horrors! the Prince!

 

DARESBY. My chum, Charles Stumply!

 

CHARLES. My Father!

 

COL. Ah, Scapegrace! dare you present yourself before me? Under

what false and shameful pretences have you entered this house?

 

O’SHAN. Charles Stumply! hang the fellow, he’s only a man after

all.

 

DARESBY. I cannot contain my surprise.

 

MRS. JUD. The ungrateful vagabond! he has stolen my best gown

and hood.

 

HORATIA. I shall sink to the cellar.

 

SOPHIA. O Daresby, how comical!

 

COL. Speak, you scamp! What has induced you to dress yourself

like--a--speak! nor add a falsehood to your other faults and

follies.

 

CHARLES. My dear Father, I have used no deception except that of

changing my name. I am the deceived, not the deceiver. No one

present is as much surprised at seeing me, as I myself am at

finding myself thus. These fair Ladies kindly and willingly took

me in, and I see that, quite unwittingly, I have taken them in

also! I own that I merit your displeasure, but I will do so no

longer. I have received a lesson which I will not soon forget.

I will no longer run counter to your wishes, but return to the

counter for which you destined me. I have long devoted myself to

a-muse, but now I will learn to obey. I own that I too fondly

sought the giddy cheer of an applauding audience. Romance and

her knights had taken possession of my fancy, but I have found

the nights too cold, and the cheer too indifferent. I return

with humble regret to my loving Sire, and if he will receive me

a-gain, he may perhaps be able to make a-gain of me yet!

 

COL. Ah, you Rogue, you little merit that I should look at

you again. The Pretender, indeed! so farewell to my dreams of

fortune! I always thought it too good to be true. Ladies, I have