THE AFFABLE STRANGER 4

THE AFFABLE STRANGER 4

"What did the defendant say to you on that occasion?"

 

"He said he would knock my head off."

 

"And what else?"

 

"He said he would mop the floor with me."

 

"And what else?"

 

"Er--also he done it."

 

There would be a great deal of progress in this world if it could be

said after the plans suggested by each man--"also he done it." The

trouble just now is that we all organize and nobody gets his head

knocked off and the floor doesn't get mopped up.

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER XIV

 

THE WARD LEADER

 

 

In Philadelphia, while being entertained by a friend, I met a ward

leader of the new world that is to be. When I heard the familiar title

"ward leader," memory cut back on the film a picture of my old friend

"Biff" McGuire, ward leader for Tammany Hall. "Biff" held sway in a

tough district, and in the words of Spencer he was "in a state of

correspondence with his environment." Leaning against the end of the bar

with his back against the wall to fend off a possible felon stroke, his

pose was one of studied carelessness. One foot rested lightly on the

footrail and at his elbow there was a bottle of his "Private Stock." In

spite of his care-free attitude, his uneasy eye, even when he was

absorbed in conversation, noticed every one who passed through the

swinging doors. He did not nod acquaintanceship to all, but those whom

he favored were more stimulated than they were by the ministrations of

the white-coated bartender. From his corner he dispensed the high, low,

and middle justice, bought drinks for his dependents and accepted drinks

from men "higher up" who dropped in to consult with him. Altogether he

was a heroic if sinister figure, much railed at by the better element. A

philanthropist in his evil way he was the sole protector of those who

were "fobbed with the rusty curb of old Father antic, the law," and of

those whose misfortunes had submerged them beyond the care of decent

society. He shielded them under his grimy ægis--in return for votes and

other obscure political service. In his rough way he dispensed the only

charity that these unfortunates knew, and at all times bore himself as

one conscious of his power in shaping the destinies and controlling the

affairs of one of the greatest cities of modern civilization. With the

picture of "Biff" McGuire in the back of my head, I met the new "ward

leader," a gentle and cultured woman, luminous with the fire of public

spirit. She held office in the Philadelphia League of Women Citizens,

which has been organized according to the best traditions of the old

political machines. To give some idea of the scope and purpose of this

Woman's Movement, I shall quote briefly from a folder which she offered

for my enlightenment.

 

THE NATIONAL LEAGUE OF WOMEN VOTERS is a national organization of

women who wish not merely to vote, but to use their votes to the

best advantage.

 

THE ORGANIZATION HAS TWO PURPOSES--To foster education in

citizenship and to support improved legislation.

 

The National League is composed of State Leagues.

 

The PROGRAMME is educational and legislative, i.e., to get behind

needed reforms, to urge their support and adoption in the

platforms of the political parties, and their enactment into laws.

 

The SLOGAN of the League is "Enroll in the Political Parties." It

is organized to do legislative work in order to promote its

programme.

 

It is NOT A WOMAN'S PARTY OR A SEPARATE POLITICAL PARTY. The

League of Women Voters hopes to accomplish its purpose in two

ways: first, by education, as to national and state human needs;

second, by the direct influence of its own members who are

enrolled voters in the already existing political parties. It is

not partisan. It will not support or attack national candidates or

national parties. To quote from the Constitution, "The National

League of Women Voters urges every woman to become an enrolled

voter, but as an organization it shall be allied with and support

no party."

 

These be "prave words," but while I listened to her eager exposition of

all the good that the League hopes to accomplish, memory played me

another scurvy trick. I remembered the one hour of mirth I enjoyed in

Ottawa during the Canadian Federal campaign of 1917. A wild-eyed man

from Montreal had rushed up to me in the office where I had a temporary

desk. Gesticulating furiously he poured out a terrible tale of what was

happening in Montreal. In the slum districts all the police court

habitues were registered as "sisters of soldiers." In that election only

such women as were the sisters, wives, mothers, or daughters of soldiers

were entitled to vote. According to my passionate informant the election

in the riding in which he was working would be controlled by the corrupt

vote of these unfortunates. Under the conditions that prevailed in that

election I knew it would be impossible to do anything, and when he

brought down his fist on a desk and thundered, almost in the words of

some forgotten poet,

 

"These are the deeds that are done in Montreal!"

 

I was moved to great laughter. I could not help thinking of a woman

friend who had been telling me how the women voters would purify

politics. She had even introduced me to Mrs. Pankhurst so that I might

get the gospel of feminism from the lips of its prophetess.

 

How the women are going to handle this submerged vote is a problem that

I have not seen discussed. Are we to have female counterparts of "Biff"

McGuire to herd these voters to the polls?

 

It seemed strange, and perhaps portentous, that I should have my first

contact with the women voters of the United States in Philadelphia,

where political methods "make the judicious grieve." What they will do

can only be known after their votes have been cast. And if race hatred

and narrow nationalism are to play an important part in the coming

campaign, it will be interesting to see if they can be swayed by the

emotional appeals that are certain to be made. Women are said to be more

emotional than men, and it is not likely that the experts of scientific

politics will overlook the work that may be done by the "sob-sisters." I

have in mind some wonderful "sob-sister" stuff that was used in the last

Canadian election. I have always suspected that it was written by a

hardened male campaign writer--but that is of no importance. What is

important is that the "psychology" of woman is to have a part in the

already complex problem of politics. It seems unkind to doubt that the

woman will play a noble and beneficent part in the politics of the

future, but I have some glimmerings of the methods that politicians may

use to defeat them, and, to lapse into parody:

 

"I walked the city streets to-day

With the sombre ghost of Matthew Quay."

 

The best hope is that the swift intuition of women will enable them to

see more quickly than men that the salvation of the democracies does not

lie in political activity, but in the way in which every citizen attends

to the little commonplace things of everyday life.

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER XV

 

THE NEW MASTER WORD

 

 

A point has been reached where I feel that I must write a chapter on

psychology in relation to present-day affairs. Not that I know anything

about it! Heaven forbid! But ever since leaving home I have been hearing

about the psychology of this and that until the conviction has grown

that an account of this dip into the world will not be complete without

a chapter on the latest and most popular of our sciences. And it is not

personal psychology that must be dealt with. It is mob-psychology--the

most elusive of all subjects--that must be passed under review.

 

But there is no escape. The thing has been meeting me everywhere. In

Toronto a hotel proprietor spoke lightly of the need of understanding

the psychology of female help if one is to have good dining-room

service. That centered my attention.

 

In Boston I had luncheon with a man who has made psychology his

life-study and is widely known as an authority on the subject. We talked

psychology, personal and general, for two blessed hours, and I was so

much interested that I almost missed an appointment. I kept the

appointment, however, and found that I had arrived "at the

psychological" moment.

 

In New York a movie magnate talked about the psychology of people who

patronize grand opera.

 

At an art auction-room I heard about the peculiar psychology of

collectors of art objects, rare books, and _et cetera_, and of the need

of understanding it if one is to deal with them successfully.

 

Presently I met a dealer in high-class stationery who was almost in

despair through need of a phrase that may be used instead of "_de

luxe_"--which is now outworn through too much use, though it was once

"an excellent good word before it was ill-sorted." His urgent need was

for a word or phrase that would "appeal to the psychology of women." As

words are the commodity in which I deal he appealed to me for help.

Apparently he had sized up my psychology properly, for I appreciated the

compliment and racked my memory for something suitable. Finally I

remembered a descriptive phrase that I had noticed in a catalogue while

looking at the hangings and furniture of the Kaiser's throne-room, that

were offered for sale while I was in New York. It was a melodious phrase

that appealed richly to three out of the five senses. When he heard it

he thanked me profusely and hurried away to have it patented as a trade

name.

 

While a collector of Japanese prints was showing me his treasures we