Humour wit Satire of the Seventeenth Century 3

Humour wit Satire of the Seventeenth Century 3

Sir _Egley More_[F. 9] that Valiant Knight, [3.]

With his fa, la, lanctre down dille;

He fetcht his sword and he went to fight

With his fa, la, lanctre down dille;

As he went over hill and dale,

All cloathed in his coat of Male,

With his fa, la, lanctre down dille.

 

A huge great Dragon leapes out of his Den,

With his &c.

Which had kill'd the Lord knowes how many men,

With his &c.

But when he saw Sir _Egly More_,

Good lack had you seen how this Dragon did roare

With his &c.

 

This Dragon he had on a plaguy hide,

With his &c.

Which could both sword and speare abide,

All the trees in the wood did shake,

With his &c.

Stars did tremble and man did quake,

With his &c.

But had you seen how the birds lay peeping,

'Twould have made a mans heart to a' fallen a weeping.

With his &c.

 

But now it was too late to feare,

With his &c.

For now it was come to fight dog, fight beare,

With his &c.

And as a yawning he did fall,

He thrust his sword in, hilts and all.

With his &c.

 

But now as the Knight in coller[F. 10] did burne,

With his &c.

He ow'd the Dragon a shrewd good turne;

With his &c.

In at his mouth his sword he bent,

The hilt appeared at his fundament.

With his &c.

 

Then the Dragon like a Coward began to fly,

With his &c.

Unto his Den that was hard by.

With his &c.

And there he laid him down and roar'd;

The Knight was vexed for his sword,

With his &c.

 

The Sword it was a right good blade,

With his &c.

As ever Turk or Spaniard made;

With his &c.

I for my part do forsake it,

And he that will fetch it, let him take it.

With his &c.

 

When all this was done to the Ale house he went,

With his &c.

And by and by his two pence he spent;

With his &c.

For he was so hot with tugging with the Dragon,

That nothing could quench him but a whole Flagon.

With his &c.

 

Now God preserve our King and Queen,

With his &c.

And eke in London may be seene,

With his &c.

As many Knights, and as many more,

And all as good as Sir _Eglemore_.

With his &c.

 

[Footnote 9: For tune see Appendix.]

 

[Footnote 10: Choler, anger.]

 

 

[1.] There was a Fryer in _London_, which did use to go often to the

house of an old woman, but ever when he came to her house, she hid

all the meat she had. On a time this Fryer came to her house (bringing

certain Company with him) and demanded of the Wife if she had any

meat. And she said, Nay. Well, quoth the Fryer, have you not a

whetstone? Yea (qd. the Woman) Marry, qd. he, I would make meat

thereof. Then she brought a whetstone. He asked her likewise if she

had not a Frying-pan. Yea, said she, but what the devil will ye do

therewith? Marry (said the Fryer) you shall see by and by what I will

do with it; and when he had the pan, he set it on the fire, and put

the whetstone therein. Cocks body, said the woman, you will burn the

pan. No, no, qd. the Fryer, if you will give me some eggs, it will not

burn at all. But she would have had the pan from him, when that she

saw it was in danger; yet he would not let her, but still urged her to

fetch him some eggs, which she did. Tush said the Fryer, here are

not enow, go fetch ten or twelve. So the good Wife was constrayned to

fetch more for feare lest the Pan should burn; And when he had them,

he put them in the Pan. Now, qd he, if you have no butter the pan will

burn, and the eggs too. So the good wife being very loth to have her

pan burnt, and the eggs lost, she fetcht him a dish of butter, the

which he put into the pan, and made good meat thereof, & brought to

the table, saying, Much good may it do you my Masters, now may you

say, you have eaten of a buttered Whetstone. Whereat all the Company

laughed, but the woman was exceeding angry because the Fryer had

subtilly beguiled her of her meat.

 

 

_The Devill and the Fryar._

 

The Devill was once deceived by a fryar, [5.]

Who though he sold his soul cheated the buyer.

The devill was promist if he would supply,

The Fryar with Coyn at his necessity,

When all the debts he ow'd discharg'd were quite,

The Devill should have his soul as his by right;

The Devill defray'd all scores, payd all; at last

Demanded for his due, his soul in haste:

The Fryar return'd this answer, if I owe

You any debts at all, then you must know

I am indebted still, if nothing be

Due unto you, why do you trouble me?

 

 

_On Battus._

 

Battus doth bragge he hath a world of bookes [5.]

His studies maw holds more than well it may,

But seld' or never he upon them looks,

And yet he looks upon them every day,

He looks upon their out side, but within

He never looks nor never will begin:

Because it cleane against his nature goes

To know mens secrets, so he keeps them Close.

 

 

 

 

The

 

Unconscionable Batchelors of DARBY,

 

or the

 

Young Lasses Pawn'd by their Sweethearts, for a large

Reckoning, at _Nottingham_ Goose Fair; where

poor Susan was forced to pay the Shot.

 

 

To the Tune of _To thee, To thee &c._

 

You lovers of mirth attend a while, [10.]

a merry new ditty here I write,

I know it will make you laugh and smile,

for every line affords delight:

The Lasses of Darby with young Men,

they went to Goose Fair for recreation,

But how these Sparks did serve them then,

is truly worth your observation,

Truly, truly worth your observation,

therefore I pray observe this Ditty;

The Maids did complain they came there in vain

and was not, was not that a pity.

 

So soon as they came into the Fair,

The Batchelors made them conjues[F. 11] low,

And bid them a thousand welcomes there,

this done to a tippling school they go;

How pleasant was honest Kate and Sue,

believing they should be richly treated,

But, Neighbours and Friends, as I am true;

no Lasses ever was so cheated;

Cheated, cheated, very farely cheated,

as you may note by this new Ditty;

They were left alone, to make their moan,

and was not, was not that a pity?

 

[Illustration]

 

The innocent Lasses fair and gay,

concluded the Men was kind and free,

Because they pass'd the time away,

a plenty of cakes and ale they see;

For sider and mead they then did call,

and whatever else the House afforded,

But Susan was forc'd to pay for all,

out of the mony she had hoarded,

Hoarded, hoarded, mony she had hoarded;

it made her sing a doleful Ditty,

And so did the rest with grief opprest,

and was not, was not that a pity?

 

Young Katy she seemed something Coy,

because she would make them eager grow,

As knowing thereby she might enjoy

what beautiful Damsels long to know,

On complements they did not stand,

nor did they admire their charming features;

For they had another game in hand,

which was to pawn these pretty creatures,

Creatures, creatures, loving, loving Creatures,

which was so charming, fair, and pretty;

The Men sneak'd away, and nothing did pay,

and was not, was not, that a pity?

 

Though out of the door they enter'd first,

and left them tipling there behind,

Those innocent Maids did not mistrust,

that Batchelors could be so unkind.

Quoth Susan, I know their gone to buy

the fairings which we did so require,

And they will return I know, for why,

they do our youthful charms admire;

Therefore, therefore, stay a little longer,

and I will sing you a pleasant Ditty,

But when they found they were catch'd in the pound,

they sigh'd and weep'd the more's the pity.