Humour wit Satire of the Seventeenth Century 47

Humour wit Satire of the Seventeenth Century 47

The garments which she did weare

did shine like the brazen Crock,

And where she went, she bore such a sent

that the flyes blew in her frock.

_O this &c_

 

My Aunt so curious was,

as I to you may tell,

She used to make fat puddings

in markets for to sell.

_O this &c_

 

The smallest Candle end

my Aunt would never lose

It would helpe to make her puddings fat

with the droppings of her nose.

_O this &c_

 

Another trick she had

as I shall now declare,

Shee never swept the house,

about foure times a yeare.

_O this &c_

 

And when she swept the Hall,

the Parler or the Spence,

The dust was worth to her at least,

a shilling or 14 pence.

_O this &c_

 

One day my Aunt was set

by the fier side a spinning,

As she knew well what was to do

to wollen or to linnen.

_O this &c_

 

A change came in her minde,

her worke being in great hast,

She burn'd her Tow, her Wheele and all

because she would make no wast.

_O this &c_

 

My Aunt so patient was

of this I dare be bold,

That with her Neighbours shee

was never knowne to scolde.

_O this &c_

 

Her lips with lothsome words

she seldome would defile,

But sometimes she would whisper so loud

you might heare her half a mile

_O this &c_

 

Yet one condition more

unto you I will show,

Shee washt her dishes once a moneth,

and set them on a row.

_O this &c_

 

If other wise she had

but of a dish clout faile,

She would set them to the Dog to lick

and wipe them with his tayle.

_O this &c_

 

But to conclude in hast,

I hold it not amisse,

I love a cleanly huswife well

as may appeare by this.

_O this was one of my Aunts_

_the best of all the three_,

_And surely, though I say't myselfe_,

_a cleanely woman was she_.

L. P[F. 93]

 

FINIS.

 

London. Printed for John Wright _junior_,[F. 94] dwelling at the upper

end of the Old Baily.

 

[Footnote 90: For tune, see Appendix.]

 

[Footnote 91: Rennet.]

 

[Footnote 92: Scent.]

 

 

[Illustration]

 

Astrology (in the middle of the seventeenth century) was beginning to

fall into disrepute, and Butler, in _Hudibras_, as well as Ben Jonson

in _The Alchemist_, satirised unmercifully both the science and its

professors. The accompanying engraving "The Astrologer's Bugg Beare"

refers to an eclipse of the sun, an event, which even at that time was

considered of dire portent. Take the title of one tract as a sample.

[F. 95]"The Shepherds Prognostication, Foretelling the sad and strange

Eclipse of the Sun, which will happen on the 29 of March this present

year 1652. which Eclipse will begin about eight of the Clock in the

fore noon, and so continue till past the hour of eleven, which will

be the dismallest day that ever was known since the year 33, when our

Savior Christ suffered on the Crosse for the sins of Mankind, at which

time the Seas did roare, the earth did quake, the graves did open, the

temple rent from the top to the bottom, _Luke_ 23. 45. And there was

a darknesse over all the Land. This Prediction also foretells of many

strange Presages and Passages which will follow after that horrible

Eclipse of the Sun, and what will insue. With a perfect way whereby

to avoid the insuing danger. By L. P." (? Laurence Price.) And the

contents of the tract fully bears out its title.

 

But "L. P.," whoever he was, entered thoroughly into the joke of the

thing, and, when it was all over, wrote a book, teeming with quiet

satire, which was published on 9th April 1652, called--

 

 

 

 

The Astrologer's Bugg Beare.

 

 

[64.] In his little tract he chaffs the people most unmercifully,

yet very quietly, at times so much so that one might almost think it

written in earnest. For instance: "A Usurer that was to receive money

of a country man that was his debter on that day, durst not to venter

fourth of his house; by which meanes the man rid forth out of London

and paid not in his moneyes, for which cause the Usurer was about to

cut his own throat, and had don it, if he had not bin prevented by

some of his Neighboures.

 

Some other Christians were so fearefull of what would befall, that

they sent their maids two dayes before Black monday for to fetch in

faire water in a redynesse to wash, fearing that the ayre would infect

the water.

 

Some tooke Medicines, Pils, and Antidotes, which was administred unto

them by a supposed out landish doctor, which he had set bils for

in severall places, caling his Medicines, an Antidote against the

tirrible Eclipes of the Sun, so he got money, and they went away as

wise as woodcockes."

 

Ben Jonson, in "The Alchemist" gives a very vivid and amusing

picture of an astrologer and his gull. Act 1, Scene 3. Subtle (the

astrologer), Face (his agent), Drugger (a tobacconist).

 

 

_Subtle._ What is your name, say you, _Abel Drugger_? [65.]

 

_Drugger._ Yes Sir,

 

_Sub._ A Seller of _Tobacco_?

 

_Dru._ Yes, Sir

 

_Sub._ 'Umh,

Free of the Grocers?[F. 96]

 

_Dru._ I, and't please you.

 

_Sub._ Well,

Your business _Abel_?

 

_Dru._ This, and't please your Worship,

I am a yong beginner, and am building

Of a new shop, and't like your worship, just

At Corner of a Street: (Here's the plot on't.)

And I would know, by art, Sir, of your Worship,

Which way I should make my dore, by _Necromancie_.

And where my Shelves. And which should be for Boxes,

And which for Potts. I would be glad to thrive, Sir,

And, I was wish'd to your Worship by a Gentleman,

One Captaine _Face_, that say's you know mens _Planets_,

And their good _Angels_, and their bad.

 

_Sub._ I doe

If I do see 'hem.[F. 97]

 

_Face._ What! my honest _Abel_?

Thou art well met here.

 

_Dru._ Troth, Sir, I was speaking

Just as your Worship came here, of your Worship.

I pray you, speake for me to M^r Doctor.

 

_Face._ He shall doe anything. Doctor, doe you heare?

This is my friend, _Abel_, an honest fellow.