the memories of casanova 135

the memories of casanova 135

Thus continuing to deceive each other in all good faith, we got better,

for every letter from C---- C----, telling me how the convalescence of

her friend was progressing, was to me as balm. And as my mind grew more

composed my appetite also grew better, and my health improving day by

day, I soon, though quite unconsciously, began to take pleasure in the

simple ways of Tonine, who now never left me at night before she saw

that I was asleep.

 

Towards the end of March M---- M---- wrote to me herself, saying that

she believed herself out of danger, and that by taking care she hoped to

be able to leave her room after Easter. I replied that I should not

leave Muran till I had the pleasure of seeing her at the grating, where,

without hurrying ourselves, we could plan the execution of our scheme.

 

It was now seven weeks since M. de Bragadin had seen me, and thinking

that he would be getting anxious I resolved to go and see him that very

day. Telling Tonine that I should not be back till the evening, I

started for Venice without a cloak, for having gone to Muran masked I

had forgotten to take one. I had spent forty-eight days without going

out of my room, chiefly in tears and distress, and without taking any

food. I had just gone through an experience which flattered my self-

esteem. I had been served by a girl who would have passed for a beauty

anywhere in Europe. She was gentle, thoughtful, and delicate, and

without being taxed with foppishness I think I may say that, if she was

not in love with me, she was at all events inclined to please me to the

utmost of her ability; for all that I had been able to withstand her

youthful charms, and I now scarcely dreaded them. Seeing her every day,

I had dispersed my amorous fancies, and friendship and gratitude seemed

to have vanquished all other feelings, for I was obliged to confess that

this charming girl had lavished on me the most tender and assiduous

care.

 

She had passed whole nights on a chair by my bedside, tending me like a

mother, and never giving me the slightest cause for complaint.

 

Never had I given her a kiss, never had I allowed myself to undress in

her presence, and never (with one exception) had she come into my room

without being properly dressed. For all that, I knew that I had fought a

battle, and I felt inclined to boast at having won the victory. There

was only one circumstance that vexed me--namely, that I was nearly

certain that neither M. M. nor C. C. would consider such continence to

be within the bounds of possibility, if they heard of it, and that Laura

herself, to whom her daughter would tell the whole story, would be

sceptical, though she might out of kindness pretend to believe it all.

 

I got to M. de Bragadin's just as the soup was being served. He welcomed

me heartily, and was delighted at having foreseen that I should thus

surprise them. Besides my two other old friends, there were De la Haye,

Bavois, and Dr. Righelini at table.

 

"What! you without a cloak!" said M. Dandolo.

 

"Yes," said I; "for having gone out with my mask on I forgot to bring

one:"

 

At this they laughed, and, without putting myself out, I sat down. No

one asked where I had been so long, for it was understood that that

question should be left to me to answer or not. Nevertheless, De la

Haye, who was bursting with curiosity, could not refrain from breaking

some jests on me.

 

"You have got so thin," said he, "that uncharitable people will be

rather hard on you."

 

"I trust they will not say that I have been passing my time with the

Jesuits."

 

"You are sarcastic. They may say, perhaps, that you have passed your

time in a hot-house under the influence of Mercury."

 

"Don't be afraid, sir, for to escape this hasty judgment I shall go back

this evening."

 

"No, no, I am quite sure you will not."

 

"Believe me, sir," said I, with a bantering tone, "that I deem your

opinion of too much consequence not to be governed by it."

 

Seeing that I was in earnest, my friends were angry with him; and the

Aristarchus was in some confusion.

 

Righelini, who was one of Murray's intimate friends, said to me in a

friendly way that he had been longing to tell Murray of my re-

appearance, and of the falsity of all the reports about me.

 

"We will go to sup with him," said I, "and I will return after supper."

 

Seeing that M. de Bragadin and his two friends were uneasy about me, I

promised to dine with them on April 25th, St. Mark's Day.

 

As soon as Mr. Murray saw me, he fell on my neck and embraced me. He

introduced me to his wife, who asked me to supper with great politeness.

After Murray had told me the innumerable stories which had been made

about my disappearance, he asked me if I knew a little story by the Abbe

Chiari, which had come out at the end of the carnival. As I said that I

knew nothing about it, he gave me a copy, telling me that I should like

it. He was right. It was a satire in which the Zorzi clique was pulled

to pieces, and in which I played a very poor part. I did not read it

till some time after, and in the mean time put it in my pocket. After a

very good supper I took a gondola to return to Muran.

 

It was midnight and very dark, so that I did not perceive the gondola to

be ill covered and in wretched order. A fine rain was falling when I got

in, and the drops getting larger I was soon wet to the skin. No great

harm was done, as I was close to my quarters. I groped my way upstairs

and knocked at the door of the ante-room, where Tonine, who had not

waited for me, was sleeping. Awake in a moment she came to open the door

in her smock, and without a light. As I wanted one, I told her to get

the flint and steel, which she did, warning me in a modest voice that

she was not dressed. "That's of no consequence," said I, "provided you

are covered." She said no more, and soon lighted a candle, but she could

not help laughing when she saw me dripping wet.

 

"I only want you, my dear," said I, "to dry my hair." She quickly set to

work with powder and powder-puff in hand, but her smock was short and

loose at the top, and I repented, rather too late, that I had not given

her time to dress. I felt that all was lost, all the more as having to

use both her hands she could not hold her smock and conceal two swelling

spheres more seductive than the apples of the Hesperides. How could I

help seeing them? I shut my eyes and, said "For shame!" but I gave in at

last, and fixed such a hungry gaze upon poor Tonine that she blushed.

"Come," said I, "take your smock between your teeth and then I shall see

no more." But it was worse than before, and I had only added fuel to the

fire; for, as the veil was short, I could see the bases and almost the

frieze of two marble columns; and at this sight I gave a voluptuous cry.

Not knowing how to conceal everything from my gaze, Tonine let herself

fall on the sofa, and I, my passions at fever-heat, stood beside her,

not knowing what to do.

 

"Well," she said, "shall I go and dress myself and then do your hair?"

 

"No, come and sit on my knee, and cover my eyes with your hands." She

came obediently, but the die was cast, and my resistance overcome. I

clasped her between my arms, and without any more thoughts of playing at

blind man's buff I threw her on the bed and covered her with kisses. And

as I swore that I would always love her, she opened her arms to receive

me in a way that shewed how long she had been waiting for this moment.

 

I plucked the rose, and then, as ever, I thought it the rarest I had

ever gathered since I had laboured in the harvest of the fruitful fields

of love.

 

When I awoke in the morning I found myself more deeply in love with

Tonine than I had been with any other woman. She had got up without

waking me, but as soon as she heard me stirring she came, and I tenderly

chid her for not waiting for me to give her good morrow. Without

answering she gave me M---- M----'s letter. I thanked her, but putting

the letter on one side I took her in my arms, and set her by my side.

"What a wonder!" cried Tonine. "You are not in a hurry to read that

letter! Faithless man, why did you not let me cure you six weeks ago.

How lucky I am; thanks to the rain! I do not blame you, dear, but love

me as you love her who writes to you every day, and I shall be

satisfied."

 

"Do you know who she is?"

 

"She lives in a boarding-house, and is as beautiful as an angel; but she

is there, and I am here. You are my master, and I will be your servant

as long as you like."

 

I was glad to leave her in error, and swore an ever-lasting love; but

during our conversation she had let herself drop down in the bottom of

the bed, and I entreated her to lie down again; but she said that on the

contrary it was time for me to get up for dinner, for she wanted to give

me a dainty meal cooked in the Venetian manner.

 

"Who is the cook?" said I.

 

"I am, and I have been using all my skill on it since five, when I got

up."

 

"What time is it now, then?"

 

"Past one."

 

The girl astonished me. She was no longer the shy Tonine of last night;

she had that exultant air which happiness bestows, and the look of

pleasure which the delights of love give to a young beauty. I could not

understand how I had escaped from doing homage to her beauty when I

first saw her at her mother's house. But I was then too deeply in love

with C---- C----; I was in too great distress; and, moreover, Tonine was

then unformed. I got up, and making her bring me a cup of coffee I asked

her to keep the dinner back for a couple of hours.

 

I found M---- M----'s letter affectionate, but not so interesting as it

would have been the day before. I set myself to answer it, and was

almost thunderstruck to find the task, for the first time, a painful

one. However, my short journey to Venice supplied me with talk which

covered four pages.

 

I had an exquisite dinner with my charming Tonine. Looking at her as at

the same time my wife, my mistress, and my housekeeper, I was delighted

to find myself made happy at such a cheap rate. We spent the whole day

at the table talking of our love, and giving each other a thousand

little marks of it; for there is no such rich and pleasant matter for

conversation as when they who talk are parties to an amorous suit. She

told with charming simplicity that she knew perfectly well that she

could not make me amorous of her, because I loved another, and that her

only hope was therefore in a surprise, and that she had foreseen the

happy moment when I told her that she need not dress herself to light a candle