"So you've come to see me at last, you Anne-girl," she said.
"Mercy, child, how you have grown! You're taller than I am, I declare.
And you're ever so much better looking than you used to be, too. But I
dare say you know that without being told."
"Indeed I didn't," said
Anne radiantly. "I know I'm not so freckled as I used to be, so I've much to
be thankful for, but I really hadn't dared to hope there was any other
improvement. I'm so glad you think there is, Miss Barry." Miss Barry's house
was furnished with "great magnificence," as Anne told Marilla afterward. The
two little country girls were rather abashed by the splendor of the parlor
where Miss Barry left them when she went to see about dinner.
"Isn't
it just like a palace?" whispered Diana. "I never was in Aunt Josephine's
house before, and I'd no idea it was so grand. I just wish Julia Bell could
see this--she puts on such airs about her mother's parlor."
"Velvet
carpet," sighed Anne luxuriously, "and silk curtains! I've dreamed of such
things, Diana. But do you know I don't believe I feel very comfortable with
them after all. There are so many things in this room and all so splendid
that there is no scope for imagination. That is one consolation when you are
poor--there are so many more things you can imagine about."
Their
sojourn in town was something that Anne and Diana dated from for years. From
first to last it was crowded with delights.
On Wednesday Miss Barry took
them to the Exhibition grounds and kept them there all day.
"It was
splendid," Anne related to Marilla later on. "I never imagined anything so
interesting. I don't really know which department was the most interesting. I
think I liked the horses and the flowers and the fancywork best. Josie Pye
took first prize for knitted lace. I was real glad she did. And I was glad
that I felt glad, for it shows I'm improving, don't you think, Marilla, when
I can rejoice in Josie's success? Mr. Harmon Andrews took second prize for
Gravenstein apples and Mr. Bell took first prize for a pig. Diana said she
thought it was ridiculous for a Sunday-school superintendent to take a prize
in pigs, but I don't see why. Do you? She said she would always think of it
after this when he was praying so solemnly. Clara Louise MacPherson took
a prize for painting, and Mrs. Lynde got first prize for homemade
butter and cheese. So Avonlea was pretty well represented, wasn't it?
Mrs. Lynde was there that day, and I never knew how much I really liked
her until I saw her familiar face among all those strangers. There were
thousands of people there, Marilla. It made me feel dreadfully insignificant.
And Miss Barry took us up to the grandstand to see the horse races. Mrs.
Lynde wouldn't go; she said horse racing was an abomination and, she being a
church member, thought it her bounden duty to set a good example by staying
away. But there were so many there I don't believe Mrs. Lynde's absence would
ever be noticed. I don't think, though, that I ought to go very often to
horse races, because they ARE awfully fascinating. Diana got so excited that
she offered to bet me ten cents that the red horse would win. I didn't
believe he would, but I refused to bet, because I wanted to tell Mrs. Allan
all about everything, and I felt sure it wouldn't do to tell her that. It's
always wrong to do anything you can't tell the minister's wife. It's as good
as an extra conscience to have a minister's wife for your friend. And I
was very glad I didn't bet, because the red horse DID win, and I would
have lost ten cents. So you see that virtue was its own reward. We saw a
man go up in a balloon. I'd love to go up in a balloon, Marilla; it
would be simply thrilling; and we saw a man selling fortunes. You paid him
ten cents and a little bird picked out your fortune for you. Miss Barry
gave Diana and me ten cents each to have our fortunes told. Mine was that
I would marry a dark-complected man who was very wealthy, and I would
go across water to live. I looked carefully at all the dark men I saw
after that, but I didn't care much for any of them, and anyhow I
suppose it's too early to be looking out for him yet. Oh, it was
a never-to-be-forgotten day, Marilla. I was so tired I couldn't sleep
at night. Miss Barry put us in the spare room, according to promise.
It was an elegant room, Marilla, but somehow sleeping in a spare room
isn't what I used to think it was. That's the worst of growing up, and
I'm beginning to realize it. The things you wanted so much when you were
a child don't seem half so wonderful to you when you get
them."
Thursday the girls had a drive in the park, and in the evening
Miss Barry took them to a concert in the Academy of Music, where a
noted prima donna was to sing. To Anne the evening was a glittering vision
of delight.
"Oh, Marilla, it was beyond description. I was so excited
I couldn't even talk, so you may know what it was like. I just sat in
enraptured silence. Madame Selitsky was perfectly beautiful, and wore white
satin and diamonds. But when she began to sing I never thought about
anything else. Oh, I can't tell you how I felt. But it seemed to me that it
could never be hard to be good any more. I felt like I do when I look up
to the stars. Tears came into my eyes, but, oh, they were such happy
tears. I was so sorry when it was all over, and I told Miss Barry I didn't
see how I was ever to return to common life again. She said she thought
if we went over to the restaurant across the street and had an ice
cream it might help me. That sounded so prosaic; but to my surprise I
found it true. The ice cream was delicious, Marilla, and it was so lovely
and dissipated to be sitting there eating it at eleven o'clock at
night. Diana said she believed she was born for city life. Miss Barry
asked me what my opinion was, but I said I would have to think it over
very seriously before I could tell her what I really thought. So I thought
it over after I went to bed. That is the best time to think things out.
And I came to the conclusion, Marilla, that I wasn't born for city life
and that I was glad of it. It's nice to be eating ice cream at
brilliant restaurants at eleven o'clock at night once in a while; but as a
regular thing I'd rather be in the east gable at eleven, sound asleep, but
kind of knowing even in my sleep that the stars were shining outside and
that the wind was blowing in the firs across the brook. I told Miss
Barry so at breakfast the next morning and she laughed. Miss Barry
generally laughed at anything I said, even when I said the most solemn
things. I don't think I liked it, Marilla, because I wasn't trying to be
funny. But she is a most hospitable lady and treated us
royally."
Friday brought going-home time, and Mr. Barry drove in for the
girls.
"Well, I hope you've enjoyed yourselves," said Miss Barry, as she
bade them good-bye.
"Indeed we have," said Diana.
"And you,
Anne-girl?"
"I've enjoyed every minute of the time," said Anne, throwing
her arms impulsively about the old woman's neck and kissing her wrinkled
cheek. Diana would never have dared to do such a thing and felt rather
aghast at Anne's freedom. But Miss Barry was pleased, and she stood on
her veranda and watched the buggy out of sight. Then she went back into
her big house with a sigh. It seemed very lonely, lacking those fresh
young lives. Miss Barry was a rather selfish old lady, if the truth
must be told, and had never cared much for anybody but herself. She
valued people only as they were of service to her or amused her. Anne
had amused her, and consequently stood high in the old lady's good
graces. But Miss Barry found herself thinking less about Anne's quaint
speeches than of her fresh enthusiasms, her transparent emotions, her
little winning ways, and the sweetness of her eyes and lips.
"I
thought Marilla Cuthbert was an old fool when I heard she'd adopted a girl
out of an orphan asylum," she said to herself, "but I guess she didn't make
much of a mistake after all. If I'd a child like Anne in the house all the
time I'd be a better and happier woman."
Anne and Diana found the drive
home as pleasant as the drive in--pleasanter, indeed, since there was the
delightful consciousness of home waiting at the end of it. It was sunset when
they passed through White Sands and turned into the shore road. Beyond, the
Avonlea hills came out darkly against the saffron sky. Behind them the moon
was rising out of the sea that grew all radiant and transfigured in her
light. Every little cove along the curving road was a marvel of
dancing ripples. The waves broke with a soft swish on the rocks below them,
and the tang of the sea was in the strong, fresh air.
"Oh, but it's
good to be alive and to be going home," breathed Anne.
When she crossed
the log bridge over the brook the kitchen light of Green Gables winked her a
friendly welcome back, and through the open door shone the hearth fire,
sending out its warm red glow athwart the chilly autumn night. Anne ran
blithely up the hill and into the kitchen, where a hot supper was waiting on
the table.
"So you've got back?" said Marilla, folding up her
knitting.
"Yes, and oh, it's so good to be back," said Anne joyously. "I
could kiss everything, even to the clock. Marilla, a broiled chicken!
You don't mean to say you cooked that for me!"
"Yes, I did," said
Marilla. "I thought you'd be hungry after such a drive and need something
real appetizing. Hurry and take off your things, and we'll have supper as
soon as Matthew comes in. I'm glad you've got back, I must say. It's been
fearful lonesome here without you, and I never put in four longer
days."
After supper Anne sat before the fire between Matthew and Marilla,
and gave them a full account of her visit.
"I've had a splendid time,"
she concluded happily, "and I feel that it marks an epoch in my life. But the
best of it all was the coming home."
CHAPTER XXX. The Queens
Class Is Organized
Marilla laid her knitting on her lap and leaned
back in her chair. Her eyes were tired, and she thought vaguely that she must
see about having her glasses changed the next time she went to town, for her
eyes had grown tired very often of late.
It was nearly dark, for the
full November twilight had fallen around Green Gables, and the only light in
the kitchen came from the dancing red flames in the stove.
Anne was
curled up Turk-fashion on the hearthrug, gazing into that joyous glow where
the sunshine of a hundred summers was being distilled from the maple
cordwood. She had been reading, but her book had slipped to the floor, and
now she was dreaming, with a smile on her parted lips. Glittering castles in
Spain were shaping themselves out of the mists and rainbows of her lively
fancy; adventures wonderful and enthralling were happening to her in
cloudland--adventures that always turned out triumphantly and never involved
her in scrapes like those of actual life.
Marilla looked at her with a
tenderness that would never have been suffered to reveal itself in any
clearer light than that soft mingling of fireshine and shadow. The lesson of
a love that should display itself easily in spoken word and open look was one
Marilla could never learn. But she had learned to love this slim, gray-eyed
girl with an affection all the deeper and stronger from its very
undemonstrativeness. Her love made her afraid of being unduly indulgent,
indeed. She had an uneasy feeling that it was rather sinful to set one's
heart so intensely on any human creature as she had set hers on Anne, and
perhaps she performed a sort of unconscious penance for this by being
stricter and more critical than if the girl had been less dear to her.
Certainly Anne herself had no idea how Marilla loved her. She sometimes
thought wistfully that Marilla was very hard to please and distinctly lacking
in sympathy and understanding. But she always checked the thought
reproachfully, remembering what she owed to Marilla.
"Anne," said
Marilla abruptly, "Miss Stacy was here this afternoon when you were out with
Diana."
Anne came back from her other world with a start and a
sigh.
"Was she? Oh, I'm so sorry I wasn't in. Why didn't you call me,
Marilla? Diana and I were only over in the Haunted Wood. It's lovely in the
woods now. All the little wood things--the ferns and the satin leaves and
the crackerberries--have gone to sleep, just as if somebody had tucked
them away until spring under a blanket of leaves. I think it was a
little gray fairy with a rainbow scarf that came tiptoeing along the
last moonlight night and did it. Diana wouldn't say much about that,
though. Diana has never forgotten the scolding her mother gave her
about imagining ghosts into the Haunted Wood. It had a very bad effect
on Diana's imagination. It blighted it. Mrs. Lynde says Myrtle Bell is
a blighted being. I asked Ruby Gillis why Myrtle was blighted, and
Ruby said she guessed it was because her young man had gone back on her.
Ruby Gillis thinks of nothing but young men, and the older she gets the
worse she is. Young men are all very well in their place, but it doesn't do
to drag them into everything, does it? Diana and I are thinking
seriously of promising each other that we will never marry but be nice old
maids and live together forever. Diana hasn't quite made up her mind
though, because she thinks perhaps it would be nobler to marry some
wild, dashing, wicked young man and reform him. Diana and I talk a great
deal about serious subjects now, you know. We feel that we are so much
older than we used to be that it isn't becoming to talk of childish
matters. It's such a solemn thing to be almost fourteen, Marilla. Miss Stacy
took all us girls who are in our teens down to the brook last Wednesday,
and talked to us about it. She said we couldn't be too careful what
habits we formed and what ideals we acquired in our teens, because by the
time we were twenty our characters would be developed and the foundation
laid for our whole future life. And she said if the foundation was shaky
we could never build anything really worth while on it. Diana and I
talked the matter over coming home from school. We felt extremely
solemn, Marilla. And we decided that we would try to be very careful indeed
and form respectable habits and learn all we could and be as sensible
as possible, so that by the time we were twenty our characters would
be properly developed. It's perfectly appalling to think of being
twenty, Marilla. It sounds so fearfully old and grown up. But why was Miss
Stacy here this afternoon?"
"That is what I want to tell you, Anne, if
you'll ever give me a chance to get a word in edgewise. She was talking about
you."
"About me?" Anne looked rather scared. Then she flushed and
exclaimed:
"Oh, I know what she was saying. I meant to tell you, Marilla,
honestly I did, but I forgot. Miss Stacy caught me reading Ben Hur in
school yesterday afternoon when I should have been studying my
Canadian history. Jane Andrews lent it to me. I was reading it at dinner
hour, and I had just got to the chariot race when school went in. I was
simply wild to know how it turned out--although I felt sure Ben Hur must
win, because it wouldn't be poetical justice if he didn't--so I spread
the history open on my desk lid and then tucked Ben Hur between the desk
and my knee. I just looked as if I were studying Canadian history, you
know, while all the while I was reveling in Ben Hur. I was so interested in
it that I never noticed Miss Stacy coming down the aisle until all at once
I just looked up and there she was looking down at me, so reproachful-like. I
can't tell you how ashamed I felt, Marilla, especially when I heard Josie Pye
giggling. Miss Stacy took Ben Hur away, but she never said a word then. She
kept me in at recess and talked to me. She said I had done very wrong in two
respects. First, I was wasting the time I ought to have put on my studies;
and secondly, I was deceiving my teacher in trying to make it appear I was
reading a history when it was a storybook instead. I had never realized until
that moment, Marilla, that what I was doing was deceitful. I was shocked.
I cried bitterly, and asked Miss Stacy to forgive me and I'd never do
such a thing again; and I offered to do penance by never so much as
looking at Ben Hur for a whole week, not even to see how the chariot race
turned out. But Miss Stacy said she wouldn't require that, and she forgave
me freely. So I think it wasn't very kind of her to come up here to
you about it after all."
"Miss Stacy never mentioned such a thing to
me, Anne, and its only your guilty conscience that's the matter with you. You
have no business to be taking storybooks to school. You read too many novels
anyhow. When I was a girl I wasn't so much as allowed to look at a
novel."
"Oh, how can you call Ben Hur a novel when it's really such a
religious book?" protested Anne. "Of course it's a little too exciting to
be proper reading for Sunday, and I only read it on weekdays. And I
never read ANY book now unless either Miss Stacy or Mrs. Allan thinks it is
a proper book for a girl thirteen and three-quarters to read. Miss
Stacy made me promise that. She found me reading a book one day called,
The Lurid Mystery of the Haunted Hall. It was one Ruby Gillis had lent
me, and, oh, Marilla, it was so fascinating and creepy. It just curdled
the blood in my veins. But Miss Stacy said it was a very silly,
unwholesome book, and she asked me not to read any more of it or any like it.
I didn't mind promising not to read any more like it, but it was
AGONIZING to give back that book without knowing how it turned out. But my
love for Miss Stacy stood the test and I did. It's really wonderful,
Marilla, what you can do when you're truly anxious to please a certain
person."
"Well, I guess I'll light the lamp and get to work," said
Marilla. "I see plainly that you don't want to hear what Miss Stacy had to
say. You're more interested in the sound of your own tongue than in
anything else."
"Oh, indeed, Marilla, I do want to hear it," cried
Anne contritely. "I won't say another word--not one. I know I talk too much,
but I am really trying to overcome it, and although I say far too much, yet
if you only knew how many things I want to say and don't, you'd give me some
credit for it. Please tell me, Marilla."
"Well, Miss Stacy wants to
organize a class among her advanced students who mean to study for the
entrance examination into Queen's. She intends to give them extra lessons for
an hour after school. And she came to ask Matthew and me if we would like to
have you join it. What do you think about it yourself, Anne? Would you like
to go to Queen's and pass for a teacher?"
"Oh, Marilla!" Anne
straightened to her knees and clasped her hands. "It's been the dream of my
life--that is, for the last six months, ever since Ruby and Jane began to
talk of studying for the Entrance. But I didn't say anything about it,
because I supposed it would be perfectly useless. I'd love to be a teacher.
But won't it be dreadfully expensive? Mr. Andrews says it cost him one
hundred and fifty dollars to put Prissy through, and Prissy wasn't a dunce in
geometry."
"I guess you needn't worry about that part of it. When Matthew
and I took you to bring up we resolved we would do the best we could for
you and give you a good education. I believe in a girl being fitted to
earn her own living whether she ever has to or not. You'll always have a
home at Green Gables as long as Matthew and I are here, but nobody knows
what is going to happen in this uncertain world, and it's just as well to
be prepared. So you can join the Queen's class if you like,
Anne."
"Oh, Marilla, thank you." Anne flung her arms about Marilla's
waist and looked up earnestly into her face. "I'm extremely grateful to you
and Matthew. And I'll study as hard as I can and do my very best to be
a credit to you. I warn you not to expect much in geometry, but I think
I can hold my own in anything else if I work hard."
"I dare say you'll
get along well enough. Miss Stacy says you are bright and diligent." Not for
worlds would Marilla have told Anne just what Miss Stacy had said about her;
that would have been to pamper vanity. "You needn't rush to any extreme of
killing yourself over your books. There is no hurry. You won't be ready to
try the Entrance for a year and a half yet. But it's well to begin in time
and be thoroughly grounded, Miss Stacy says."
"I shall take more
interest than ever in my studies now," said Anne blissfully, "because I have
a purpose in life. Mr. Allan says everybody should have a purpose in life and
pursue it faithfully. Only he says we must first make sure that it is a
worthy purpose. I would call it a worthy purpose to want to be a teacher like
Miss Stacy, wouldn't you, Marilla? I think it's a very noble
profession."
The Queen's class was organized in due time. Gilbert Blythe,
Anne Shirley, Ruby Gillis, Jane Andrews, Josie Pye, Charlie Sloane, and
Moody Spurgeon MacPherson joined it. Diana Barry did not, as her
parents did not intend to send her to Queen's. This seemed nothing short of
a calamity to Anne. Never, since the night on which Minnie May had had
the croup, had she and Diana been separated in anything. On the evening
when the Queen's class first remained in school for the extra lessons
and Anne saw Diana go slowly out with the others, to walk home alone
through the Birch Path and Violet Vale, it was all the former could do to
keep her seat and refrain from rushing impulsively after her chum. A
lump came into her throat, and she hastily retired behind the pages of
her uplifted Latin grammar to hide the tears in her eyes. Not for
worlds would Anne have had Gilbert Blythe or Josie Pye see those
tears.
"But, oh, Marilla, I really felt that I had tasted the bitterness
of death, as Mr. Allan said in his sermon last Sunday, when I saw Diana
go out alone," she said mournfully that night. "I thought how splendid
it would have been if Diana had only been going to study for the
Entrance, too. But we can't have things perfect in this imperfect world, as
Mrs. Lynde says. Mrs. Lynde isn't exactly a comforting person sometimes,
but there's no doubt she says a great many very true things. And I think
the Queen's class is going to be extremely interesting. Jane and Ruby are
just going to study to be teachers. That is the height of their ambition.
Ruby says she will only teach for two years after she gets through, and then
she intends to be married. Jane says she will devote her whole life to
teaching, and never, never marry, because you are paid a salary for teaching,
but a husband won't pay you anything, and growls if you ask for a share in
the egg and butter money. I expect Jane speaks from mournful experience, for
Mrs. Lynde says that her father is a perfect old crank, and meaner than
second skimmings. Josie Pye says she is just going to college for education's
sake, because she won't have to earn her own living; she says of course it is
different with orphans who are living on charity--THEY have to hustle. Moody
Spurgeon is going to be a minister. Mrs. Lynde says he couldn't be anything
else with a name like that to live up to. I hope it isn't wicked of me,
Marilla, but really the thought of Moody Spurgeon being a minister makes me
laugh. He's such a funny-looking boy with that big fat face, and his
little blue eyes, and his ears sticking out like flaps. But perhaps he
will be more intellectual looking when he grows up. Charlie Sloane says
he's going to go into politics and be a member of Parliament, but Mrs.
Lynde says he'll never succeed at that, because the Sloanes are all
honest people, and it's only rascals that get on in politics
nowadays."
"What is Gilbert Blythe going to be?" queried Marilla, seeing
that Anne was opening her Caesar.
"I don't happen to know what Gilbert
Blythe's ambition in life is--if he has any," said Anne
scornfully.
There was open rivalry between Gilbert and Anne now.
Previously the rivalry had been rather onesided, but there was no longer any
doubt that Gilbert was as determined to be first in class as Anne was. He
was a foeman worthy of her steel. The other members of the class
tacitly acknowledged their superiority, and never dreamed of trying to
compete with them.
Since the day by the pond when she had refused to
listen to his plea for forgiveness, Gilbert, save for the aforesaid
determined rivalry, had evinced no recognition whatever of the existence of
Anne Shirley. He talked and jested with the other girls, exchanged books and
puzzles with them, discussed lessons and plans, sometimes walked home with
one or the other of them from prayer meeting or Debating Club. But Anne
Shirley he simply ignored, and Anne found out that it is not pleasant to
be ignored. It was in vain that she told herself with a toss of her
head that she did not care. Deep down in her wayward, feminine little
heart she knew that she did care, and that if she had that chance of the
Lake of Shining Waters again she would answer very differently. All
at once, as it seemed, and to her secret dismay, she found that the
old resentment she had cherished against him was gone--gone just when
she most needed its sustaining power. It was in vain that she recalled
every incident and emotion of that memorable occasion and tried to
feel the old satisfying anger. That day by the pond had witnessed its
last spasmodic flicker. Anne realized that she had forgiven and
forgotten without knowing it. But it was too late.
And at least
neither Gilbert nor anybody else, not even Diana, should ever suspect how
sorry she was and how much she wished she hadn't been so proud and horrid!
She determined to "shroud her feelings in deepest oblivion," and it may be
stated here and now that she did it, so successfully that Gilbert, who
possibly was not quite so indifferent as he seemed, could not console himself
with any belief that Anne felt his retaliatory scorn. The only poor comfort
he had was that she snubbed Charlie Sloane, unmercifully, continually, and
undeservedly.
Otherwise the winter passed away in a round of pleasant
duties and studies. For Anne the days slipped by like golden beads on the
necklace of the year. She was happy, eager, interested; there were lessons to
be learned and honor to be won; delightful books to read; new pieces to
be practiced for the Sunday-school choir; pleasant Saturday afternoons
at the manse with Mrs. Allan; and then, almost before Anne realized
it, spring had come again to Green Gables and all the world was abloom
once more.
Studies palled just a wee bit then; the Queen's class, left
behind in school while the others scattered to green lanes and leafy wood
cuts and meadow byways, looked wistfully out of the windows and discovered
that Latin verbs and French exercises had somehow lost the tang and zest
they had possessed in the crisp winter months. Even Anne and Gilbert
lagged and grew indifferent. Teacher and taught were alike glad when the
term was ended and the glad vacation days stretched rosily before
them.
"But you've done good work this past year," Miss Stacy told them on
the last evening, "and you deserve a good, jolly vacation. Have the
best time you can in the out-of-door world and lay in a good stock of
health and vitality and ambition to carry you through next year. It will be
the tug of war, you know--the last year before the Entrance."
"Are you
going to be back next year, Miss Stacy?" asked Josie Pye.
Josie Pye never
scrupled to ask questions; in this instance the rest of the class felt
grateful to her; none of them would have dared to ask it of Miss Stacy, but
all wanted to, for there had been alarming rumors running at large through
the school for some time that Miss Stacy was not coming back the next
year--that she had been offered a position in the grade school of her own
home district and meant to accept. The Queen's class listened in breathless
suspense for her answer.
"Yes, I think I will," said Miss Stacy. "I
thought of taking another school, but I have decided to come back to Avonlea.
To tell the truth, I've grown so interested in my pupils here that I found I
couldn't leave them. So I'll stay and see you through."
"Hurrah!" said
Moody Spurgeon. Moody Spurgeon had never been so carried away by his feelings
before, and he blushed uncomfortably every time he thought about it for a
week.
"Oh, I'm so glad," said Anne, with shining eyes. "Dear Stacy, it
would be perfectly dreadful if you didn't come back. I don't believe I
could have the heart to go on with my studies at all if another teacher
came here."
When Anne got home that night she stacked all her
textbooks away in an old trunk in the attic, locked it, and threw the key
into the blanket box.
"I'm not even going to look at a schoolbook in
vacation," she told Marilla. "I've studied as hard all the term as I possibly
could and I've pored over that geometry until I know every proposition in the
first book off by heart, even when the letters ARE changed. I just feel
tired of everything sensible and I'm going to let my imagination run riot
for the summer. Oh, you needn't be alarmed, Marilla. I'll only let it
run riot within reasonable limits. But I want to have a real good jolly
time this summer, for maybe it's the last summer I'll be a little girl.
Mrs. Lynde says that if I keep stretching out next year as I've done
this I'll have to put on longer skirts. She says I'm all running to legs
and eyes. And when I put on longer skirts I shall feel that I have to
live up to them and be very dignified. It won't even do to believe in
fairies then, I'm afraid; so I'm going to believe in them with all my
whole heart this summer. I think we're going to have a very gay vacation.
Ruby Gillis is going to have a birthday party soon and there's the
Sunday school picnic and the missionary concert next month. And Mr. Barry
says that some evening he'll take Diana and me over to the White Sands
Hotel and have dinner there. They have dinner there in the evening, you
know. Jane Andrews was over once last summer and she says it was a
dazzling sight to see the electric lights and the flowers and all the lady
guests in such beautiful dresses. Jane says it was her first glimpse into
high life and she'll never forget it to her dying day."
Mrs. Lynde
came up the next afternoon to find out why Marilla had not been at the Aid
meeting on Thursday. When Marilla was not at Aid meeting people knew there
was something wrong at Green Gables.
"Matthew had a bad spell with his
heart Thursday," Marilla explained, "and I didn't feel like leaving him. Oh,
yes, he's all right again now, but he takes them spells oftener than he used
to and I'm anxious about him. The doctor says he must be careful to avoid
excitement. That's easy enough, for Matthew doesn't go about looking for
excitement by any means and never did, but he's not to do any very heavy work
either and you might as well tell Matthew not to breathe as not to work. Come
and lay off your things, Rachel. You'll stay to tea?"
"Well, seeing
you're so pressing, perhaps I might as well, stay" said Mrs. Rachel, who had
not the slightest intention of doing anything else.
Mrs. Rachel and
Marilla sat comfortably in the parlor while Anne got the tea and made hot
biscuits that were light and white enough to defy even Mrs. Rachel's
criticism.
"I must say Anne has turned out a real smart girl," admitted
Mrs. Rachel, as Marilla accompanied her to the end of the lane at
sunset. "She must be a great help to you."
"She is," said Marilla,
"and she's real steady and reliable now. I used to be afraid she'd never get
over her featherbrained ways, but she has and I wouldn't be afraid to trust
her in anything now."
"I never would have thought she'd have turned out
so well that first day I was here three years ago," said Mrs. Rachel. "Lawful
heart, shall I ever forget that tantrum of hers! When I went home that night
I says to Thomas, says I, 'Mark my words, Thomas, Marilla Cuthbert'll live
to rue the step she's took.' But I was mistaken and I'm real glad of it.
I ain't one of those kind of people, Marilla, as can never be brought
to own up that they've made a mistake. No, that never was my way,
thank goodness. I did make a mistake in judging Anne, but it weren't
no wonder, for an odder, unexpecteder witch of a child there never was
in this world, that's what. There was no ciphering her out by the
rules that worked with other children. It's nothing short of wonderful
how she's improved these three years, but especially in looks. She's a
real pretty girl got to be, though I can't say I'm overly partial to
that pale, big-eyed style myself. I like more snap and color, like
Diana Barry has or Ruby Gillis. Ruby Gillis's looks are real showy.
But somehow--I don't know how it is but when Anne and them are
together, though she ain't half as handsome, she makes them look kind of
common and overdone--something like them white June lilies she calls
narcissus alongside of the big, red peonies, that's
what."
CHAPTER XXXI. Where the Brook and River
Meet
Anne had her "good" summer and enjoyed it wholeheartedly. She
and Diana fairly lived outdoors, reveling in all the delights that Lover's
Lane and the Dryad's Bubble and Willowmere and Victoria Island
afforded. Marilla offered no objections to Anne's gypsyings. The
Spencervale doctor who had come the night Minnie May had the croup met Anne
at the house of a patient one afternoon early in vacation, looked her
over sharply, screwed up his mouth, shook his head, and sent a message
to Marilla Cuthbert by another person. It was:
"Keep that redheaded
girl of yours in the open air all summer and don't let her read books until
she gets more spring into her step."
This message frightened Marilla
wholesomely. She read Anne's death warrant by consumption in it unless it was
scrupulously obeyed. As a result, Anne had the golden summer of her life as
far as freedom and frolic went. She walked, rowed, berried, and dreamed to
her heart's content; and when September came she was bright-eyed and alert,
with a step that would have satisfied the Spencervale doctor and a heart
full of ambition and zest once more.
"I feel just like studying with
might and main," she declared as she brought her books down from the attic.
"Oh, you good old friends, I'm glad to see your honest faces once more--yes,
even you, geometry. I've had a perfectly beautiful summer, Marilla, and now
I'm rejoicing as a strong man to run a race, as Mr. Allan said last Sunday.
Doesn't Mr. Allan preach magnificent sermons? Mrs. Lynde says he is improving
every day and the first thing we know some city church will gobble him
up and then we'll be left and have to turn to and break in another
green preacher. But I don't see the use of meeting trouble halfway, do
you, Marilla? I think it would be better just to enjoy Mr. Allan while
we have him. If I were a man I think I'd be a minister. They can have such
an influence for good, if their theology is sound; and it must be thrilling
to preach splendid sermons and stir your hearers' hearts. Why can't women be
ministers, Marilla? I asked Mrs. Lynde that and she was shocked and said it
would be a scandalous thing. She said there might be female ministers in the
States and she believed there was, but thank goodness we hadn't got to that
stage in Canada yet and she hoped we never would. But I don't see why. I
think women would make splendid ministers. When there is a social to be got
up or a church tea or anything else to raise money the women have to turn to
and do the work. I'm sure Mrs. Lynde can pray every bit as well as
Superintendent Bell and I've no doubt she could preach too with a little
practice."
"Yes, I believe she could," said Marilla dryly. "She does
plenty of unofficial preaching as it is. Nobody has much of a chance to go
wrong in Avonlea with Rachel to oversee them."
"Marilla," said Anne in
a burst of confidence, "I want to tell you something and ask you what you
think about it. It has worried me terribly--on Sunday afternoons, that is,
when I think specially about such matters. I do really want to be good; and
when I'm with you or Mrs. Allan or Miss Stacy I want it more than ever and I
want to do just what would please you and what you would approve of. But
mostly when I'm with Mrs. Lynde I feel desperately wicked and as if I wanted
to go and do the very thing she tells me I oughtn't to do. I feel
irresistibly tempted to do it. Now, what do you think is the reason I feel
like that? Do you think it's because I'm really bad and
unregenerate?"
Marilla looked dubious for a moment. Then she
laughed.
"If you are I guess I am too, Anne, for Rachel often has that
very effect on me. I sometimes think she'd have more of an influence
for good, as you say yourself, if she didn't keep nagging people to
do right. There should have been a special commandment against
nagging. But there, I shouldn't talk so. Rachel is a good Christian woman and
she means well. There isn't a kinder soul in Avonlea and she never
shirks her share of work."
"I'm very glad you feel the same," said
Anne decidedly. "It's so encouraging. I shan't worry so much over that after
this. But I dare say there'll be other things to worry me. They keep coming
up new all the time--things to perplex you, you know. You settle one question
and there's another right after. There are so many things to be thought
over and decided when you're beginning to grow up. It keeps me busy all
the time thinking them over and deciding what is right. It's a serious
thing to grow up, isn't it, Marilla? But when I have such good friends
as you and Matthew and Mrs. Allan and Miss Stacy I ought to grow
up successfully, and I'm sure it will be my own fault if I don't. I
feel it's a great responsibility because I have only the one chance. If
I don't grow up right I can't go back and begin over again. I've grown
two inches this summer, Marilla. Mr. Gillis measured me at Ruby's party.
I'm so glad you made my new dresses longer. That dark-green one is so
pretty and it was sweet of you to put on the flounce. Of course I know
it wasn't really necessary, but flounces are so stylish this fall and
Josie Pye has flounces on all her dresses. I know I'll be able to study
better because of mine. I shall have such a comfortable feeling deep down in
my mind about that flounce."
"It's worth something to have that,"
admitted Marilla.
Miss Stacy came back to Avonlea school and found all
her pupils eager for work once more. Especially did the Queen's class gird up
their loins for the fray, for at the end of the coming year, dimly shadowing
their pathway already, loomed up that fateful thing known as "the
Entrance," at the thought of which one and all felt their hearts sink into
their very shoes. Suppose they did not pass! That thought was doomed
to haunt Anne through the waking hours of that winter, Sunday
afternoons inclusive, to the almost entire exclusion of moral and
theological problems. When Anne had bad dreams she found herself staring
miserably at pass lists of the Entrance exams, where Gilbert Blythe's name
was blazoned at the top and in which hers did not appear at all.
But
it was a jolly, busy, happy swift-flying winter. Schoolwork was as
interesting, class rivalry as absorbing, as of yore. New worlds of thought,
feeling, and ambition, fresh, fascinating fields of unexplored knowledge
seemed to be opening out before Anne's eager eyes.
"Hills
peeped o'er hill and Alps on Alps arose."
Much of all this was due to
Miss Stacy's tactful, careful, broadminded guidance. She led her class to
think and explore and discover for themselves and encouraged straying from
the old beaten paths to a degree that quite shocked Mrs. Lynde and the school
trustees, who viewed all innovations on established methods rather
dubiously.
Apart from her studies Anne expanded socially, for Marilla,
mindful of the Spencervale doctor's dictum, no longer vetoed occasional
outings. The Debating Club flourished and gave several concerts; there were
one or two parties almost verging on grown-up affairs; there were
sleigh drives and skating frolics galore.
Between times Anne grew,
shooting up so rapidly that Marilla was astonished one day, when they were
standing side by side, to find the girl was taller than herself.
"Why,
Anne, how you've grown!" she said, almost unbelievingly. A sigh followed on
the words. Marilla felt a queer regret over Anne's inches. The child she had
learned to love had vanished somehow and here was this tall, serious-eyed
girl of fifteen, with the thoughtful brows and the proudly poised little
head, in her place. Marilla loved the girl as much as she had loved the
child, but she was conscious of a queer sorrowful sense of loss. And that
night, when Anne had gone to prayer meeting with Diana, Marilla sat alone in
the wintry twilight and indulged in the weakness of a cry. Matthew, coming in
with a lantern, caught her at it and gazed at her in such consternation that
Marilla had to laugh through her tears.
"I was thinking about Anne,"
she explained. "She's got to be such a big girl--and she'll probably be away
from us next winter. I'll miss her terrible."
"She'll be able to come
home often," comforted Matthew, to whom Anne was as yet and always would be
the little, eager girl he had brought home from Bright River on that June
evening four years before. "The branch railroad will be built to Carmody by
that time."
"It won't be the same thing as having her here all the time,"
sighed Marilla gloomily, determined to enjoy her luxury of grief
uncomforted. "But there--men can't understand these things!"
There
were other changes in Anne no less real than the physical change. For one
thing, she became much quieter. Perhaps she thought all the more and dreamed
as much as ever, but she certainly talked less. Marilla noticed and commented
on this also.
"You don't chatter half as much as you used to, Anne, nor
use half as many big words. What has come over you?"
Anne colored and
laughed a little, as she dropped her book and looked dreamily out of the
window, where big fat red buds were bursting out on the creeper in response
to the lure of the spring sunshine.
"I don't know--I don't want to talk
as much," she said, denting her chin thoughtfully with her forefinger. "It's
nicer to think dear, pretty thoughts and keep them in one's heart, like
treasures. I don't like to have them laughed at or wondered over. And somehow
I don't want to use big words any more. It's almost a pity, isn't it, now
that I'm really growing big enough to say them if I did want to. It's fun to
be almost grown up in some ways, but it's not the kind of fun I expected,
Marilla. There's so much to learn and do and think that there isn't time for
big words. Besides, Miss Stacy says the short ones are much stronger
and better. She makes us write all our essays as simply as possible. It
was hard at first. I was so used to crowding in all the fine big words
I could think of--and I thought of any number of them. But I've got
used to it now and I see it's so much better."
"What has become of
your story club? I haven't heard you speak of it for a long
time."
"The story club isn't in existence any longer. We hadn't time
for it--and anyhow I think we had got tired of it. It was silly to
be writing about love and murder and elopements and mysteries. Miss
Stacy sometimes has us write a story for training in composition, but
she won't let us write anything but what might happen in Avonlea in our
own lives, and she criticizes it very sharply and makes us criticize our
own too. I never thought my compositions had so many faults until I began
to look for them myself. I felt so ashamed I wanted to give up
altogether, but Miss Stacy said I could learn to write well if I only trained
myself to be my own severest critic. And so I am trying to."
"You've
only two more months before the Entrance," said Marilla. "Do you think you'll
be able to get through?"
Anne shivered.
"I don't know. Sometimes I
think I'll be all right--and then I get horribly afraid. We've studied hard
and Miss Stacy has drilled us thoroughly, but we mayn't get through for all
that. We've each got a stumbling block. Mine is geometry of course, and
Jane's is Latin, and Ruby and Charlie's is algebra, and Josie's is
arithmetic. Moody Spurgeon says he feels it in his bones that he is going to
fail in English history. Miss Stacy is going to give us examinations in June
just as hard as we'll have at the Entrance and mark us just as strictly,
so we'll have some idea. I wish it was all over, Marilla. It haunts
me. Sometimes I wake up in the night and wonder what I'll do if I
don't pass."
"Why, go to school next year and try again," said Marilla
unconcernedly.
"Oh, I don't believe I'd have the heart for it. It would
be such a disgrace to fail, especially if Gil--if the others passed. And I
get so nervous in an examination that I'm likely to make a mess of it. I wish
I had nerves like Jane Andrews. Nothing rattles her."
Anne sighed and,
dragging her eyes from the witcheries of the spring world, the beckoning day
of breeze and blue, and the green things upspringing in the garden, buried
herself resolutely in her book. There would be other springs, but if she did
not succeed in passing the Entrance, Anne felt convinced that she would never
recover sufficiently to enjoy them.
CHAPTER XXXII. The
Pass List Is Out
With the end of June came the close of the term and
the close of Miss Stacy's rule in Avonlea school. Anne and Diana walked home
that evening feeling very sober indeed. Red eyes and damp handkerchiefs
bore convincing testimony to the fact that Miss Stacy's farewell words
must have been quite as touching as Mr. Phillips's had been under
similar circumstances three years before. Diana looked back at the
schoolhouse from the foot of the spruce hill and sighed deeply.
"It
does seem as if it was the end of everything, doesn't it?" she
said dismally.
"You oughtn't to feel half as badly as I do," said
Anne, hunting vainly for a dry spot on her handkerchief. "You'll be back
again next winter, but I suppose I've left the dear old school forever--if I
have good luck, that is." |
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